Inspired by Bears: Nurturing and Protecting

Here in Colorado, it is almost time for mother bears to begin hibernating, have babies, and stay in their dens while their babies nurse and grow.  Mother bears are strong and nurturing and protect their young.

Do you need to protect anyone/anything?  Sometimes we need to draw on our inner strength to make a boundary, protect, and nurture what is important to us. It could be children, pets, a pet project, expressions of ourselves, or something else. What has been important to me has been making art for my own fulfillment, and helping others grow their empowerment.  

In the past, when I took time and energy to take care of myself or a project that was important to me, I often noticed an undercurrent of guilt.  Prioritizing myself and my work went against the ancestral and societal beliefs that I took on and inherited, such as the belief that women’s work was not as important.  As a feminist, I was surprised to find these beliefs in myself, but it explained the nagging guilt and discomfort I felt when focusing on my own work.

Even with the advent of feminism in the 1970’s, these sorts of inherited beliefs take a long time to change in society and, when left unconscious, in ourselves.  (Witness how women still do not get equal pay).  Interestingly, I also had unconscious and sometimes conflicting beliefs around how I should be ambitious and financially very successful, and that I should work very hard in order for my efforts to be worthy of acceptance.

I am healing and changing those beliefs, and in turn, my emotional well-being and my ability to be fully present and do my work in my own way, for my own reasons, and with my own standards of success.  My standards of success include helping people to forge their own path and love and accept themselves for the infinitely worthy person they are.  My standards of success also include doing my work in a calm way, and balancing it with connection and laughter.

Honoring my values and doing what is important to me in my own way helps me grow into a truer version of myself.  While I was writing this essay, I did some intuitive drawing and received an image of myself as a seed pod, growing fuller with seeds to deposit for the next generation of people who want to live as their authentic selves. 

The seeds I am depositing include seeds of hope, seeds of vitality, and seeds of self-respect.  They are seeds for living a life that is guided by love and our inner compasses rather than by outer expectations.  

A friend sent me this quote a few weeks ago:  “what if your markers of success were how well you slept at night? how many books you read? how easily you laughed? how much time you spent storytelling, feeling warm in the arms and homes of people you adore” – the daily rest

May we all find our own markers of success sourced from our hearts, and protect and nurture them with acceptance and respect for ourselves and others.

(With thanks to my friend Diane for sending me this quote.  You can find her and her excellent work as a parenting coach at www.InfantCoaching.com)